America Bowl: U.S. Presidents vs. Super Bowls

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2010-04-28T09:46:00.001-04:00

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America Bowl Postgame Wrap-Up

2010-02-09T08:47:00.001-05:00

Thanks to everyone who read America Bowl, talked about it, linked to it, wrote about it, illustrated it (see awesome drawings above, with their own links), questioned my sanity, only partly questioned my sanity, used it as a business metaphor, and made valuable suggestions (yeah, I know the Van Buren decision was controversial). To make it easier to read the whole thing in order, from one to 44, you can begin here at Game 1: George Washington vs. Super Bowl I. The bottom of each game recap now has a convenient link to the next number. Also, you can click here for the Complete America Bowl Scorecard with all the results and links to all the individual write-ups.

What can we conclude about America from America Bowl? Besides the obvious fact that we love football and like Presidents? The breakdown by quarter shows a clear trend:

	1	2	3	4	final
Presidents	8	4	6	2	20
Super Bowls	3	7	5	9	24

The Presidents dominated early, crushing in the first quarter and still leading at halftime. The Super Bowls surged late to win it. Why? Theories abound. The guess here is that the NFL has tweaked its rules to make its games more competitive and higher scoring. The league can do what it wants. The Presidents have to answer to everybody. It's tougher for them to get it done. Ain't that America -- we wouldn't have it any other way.

What's next? Hey, football season is over, but have a happy Presidents' Day! We can't say we'll do this again next year. But here's something to think about: Vice Presidents versus Bud Bowls.

Game 44: Barack Obama vs. Super Bowl XLIV

2010-02-08T00:31:00.006-05:00

There was some pre-game debate about how this one was going to work. Would we compare Barack Obama against the whole Super Bowl XLIV, or only the game's first quarter? Obama has just reached the first quarter of his four-year term, after all. Is it fair to judge him against a Super Bowl that played out to the end, so everyone knows how it turned out?

Well, yes. That's what a Super Bowl is. Four quarters of football. If you'd judged Super Bowl XLIV by its first quarter, it would have been a bit premature: the Colts won the quarter, 10-0, the Saints couldn't get a thing done against an unbending Indianapolis defense, and the game didn't seem exciting or surprising at all.

    In the second quarter, the Saints started to find their groove. They ran 26 offensive plays, compared to 6 for the Colts. They couldn't reach the end zone yet, but kicker Garrett Hartley drilled two field goals, and the New Orleans defense held the Colts scoreless, to make it 10-6 at the half. The Saints busted out of halftime by recovering a bold onside kick. Six plays later, QB Drew Brees hit RB Pierre Thomas with a pass behind the line of scrimmage at the Colts' 20, and Thomas twisted his way into the end zone to give underdog New Orleans its first lead.

Unflappable Colts QB Peyton Manning led the experienced Colts back -- 76 yards in ten plays, capped by Joseph Addai's own pinball-wizard run to put the Colts back on top 17-13. A Saints FG made it 17-16 heading into the final 15 minutes. Then the Saints' D stepped up, forcing the Colts into a long FG attempt that missed, and Brees stormed back. With 5:46 left, he hit TE Jeremy Shockey running a slant at the goal line, and a clutch two-point conversion put the Saints back up, 24-17.

Still, the Colts had managed seven fourth-quarter comebacks during the season, and Manning can never be counted out. Manning himself was trailing after the first quarter of Super Bowl XLI before coming back to beat the Bears. Another Colts TD almost seemed inevitable, and then as Indy drove downfield it happened: Saints CB Tracy Porter stepped in front of Colts receiver Reggie Wayne, picked off a Manning pass, and took it to the house. Saints 31, Colts 17. A gigantic upset, a terrific game, and a storybook ending for the city of New Orleans.

Obama entered office amid the same kind of hopes many fans had for the Saints. He was the first African-American President in history. Already an historic figure when he took the oath of office, he promised more change. He had the smarts and the charisma, the popular mandate and the Congressional majority do get it done. Then he got smacked by reality.

   A down economy forced Obama to commit billions of dollars to a massive stimulus plan. He said he'd close the controversial prison at Guantanamo Bay, but couldn't work out the details. His attempts to reform healthcare were met by a tenacious "prevent" defense, intended to keep him from scoring any points. By the end of his first year -- his first quarter -- Obama could take credit only for not letting things get worse. It took a strident State of the Union speech and a feisty, televised discussion with Republican leaders to remind many people why they'd voted for him.

   Score this one for the Super Bowls. It's hard to compare Obama's Presidency favorably to Super Bowl XLIV. After a sputtering start, the game just kept getting better. Outside of America Bowl, at least, Obama still has time on the clock, and -- because we won't stop cheering for great football games and hoping for great Presidents -- he still has a chance to do the same.

Final score of America Bowl: Super Bowls 24, Presidents 20.

Come back tomorrow for a complete post-America Bowl recap.

Game 43: George W. Bush vs. Super Bowl XLIII

2010-02-07T09:56:00.002-05:00

This is a must-win match for the Presidents here in America Bowl. They're down by two points, with two matches to go. There are no timeouts left. There is no margin for error. Here comes George W. Bush.

Bush, son of 41st President George H.W. Bush, came into office by squeezing past Al Gore in the disputed election of 2000. He got some tough breaks and found it hard to get a rhythm going. The Internet bubble burst, the stock market plummeted, and it turned out that Texas energy giant Enron was a sham. Terrorists struck America on September 11, 2001. Terrorist leader Osama Bin Laden escaped U.S. forces in Afghanistan. The U.S. invaded Iraq to stop "weapons of mass destruction," which were not found to exist. "Mission Accomplished" was declared in the Iraq invasion, and Saddam Hussein was brought to justice, but bombings and chaos continued.

Photos were released of U.S. soldiers torturing prisoners at Abu Ghraib. Hurricane Katrina did not go well. The federal deficit reached an all-time record. Are we done yet? Financial meltdown, anyone? Bush left office with low approval ratings, but the nation at least hadn't experienced another terrorist attack after 9/11.

Super Bowl XLII started slowly, then just kept getting better. Early, it was all Steelers, going for their sixth ring. Just when the Arizona Cardinals, down 10-7, were about to drive it into the Steelers' end zone late in the first half, Steelers LB James Harrison picked off a Kurt Warner pass and ran it back 100 yards for the longest TD in Super Bowl history. Pittsburgh added a FG in the low-scoring third quarter to make it 20-7. Six-burgh!

No team in Super Bowl history had come back from a 13-point deficit to win. But in the fourth quarter, Cardinals star WR Larry Fitzgerald made a leaping end-zone grab to make it 20-14. A Steelers holding penalty in their own end zone caused a safety: 20-16. Then Warner hit Fitzgerald streaking at midfield on a post pattern for a 64-yard TD, incredibly, to put Arizona up 23-20 with 2:37 left.

QB Ben Roethlisberger drove the Steelers back into the Cardinals' red zone. With 49 seconds and no timeouts left, he fired a laser pass deep to the left corner of the Cardinals end zone -- it whizzed past the fingers of WR Santonio Holmes. On the next play, they tried the same thing in the right-side corner. Holmes stretched and held the ball on as he dragged his toes to stay in bounds. Steelers win!

On the sidelines as confetti fell, Roethlisberger was handed a cell phone. It was Barack Obama, the new President, congratulating him on the victory. Obama didn't know it at the time, but he was also conceding the Presidents' defeat in America Bowl. Super Bowl XLIV vs. Obama, coming up next, could be a good one, but it will be played only for pride.

Score after this match: Super Bowls 23, Presidents 20.

Go to next match.

Game 42: Bill Clinton vs. Super Bowl XLII

2010-02-06T10:04:00.003-05:00

Perfection is an unforgiving master. The New England Patriots entered Super Bowl XLII with an 18-0 record, on the cusp of recording the only 19-0 season in NFL history. T-shirts proclaiming "19-0" were printed. All New England needed to do was defeat the underdog New York Giants, a team the Patriots had already beaten during the season. Bill Clinton, from as early as high school, groomed himself to become the perfect politician. He was brilliant and studied hard. He was handsome and skilled at winning people over. All the pieces were in place. Here's what happened.

Clinton entered the White House in 1993 amid a down economy, but soon was presiding over a long stretch of relative peace and great prosperity. The explosion of the Internet and the stock market boom created millionaires everywhere, invigorated America's entrepreneurial spirit, and changed lifestyles. Jobs were up, crime was down, music was free. Life seemed easy. But Clinton had an Achilles heel. Even before he won the Presidency, news of extramarital affairs had begun to emerge, and it would only get worse, giving ammunition to his political opponents. In 1995 he had an improper relationship with White House intern Monica Lewinsky, and his denials led the House of Representatives to impeach him in 1998 (he remained in office). It was a disgrace that would forever taint his standing in history. By the time Clinton's vice president Al Gore ran for President in 2000, Gore didn't even use Clinton's name to help him.

The Patriots didn't undo themselves. It took perhaps the greatest play in Super Bowl history to threaten the Patriots' perfection. The game had been a tough defensive battle for three quarters, and the final frame began with the Patriots up 7-3. The lead would change a hands a few more times. Giants QB Eli Manning led an 80-yard drive, which included a 45-yard pass to rookie TE Kevin Boss and ended on a TD pass to WR David Tyree to put the Giants up 10-7 with 11:05 left. After some back and forth, Tom Brady and the Pats drove back with a clock-munching drive. Brady found Randy Moss in the end zone to regain the lead, 14-10.

The Giants had about two minutes to make history. On a key third-and-five from his own 44 with 1:15 left, Manning dropped back and soon found three Patriots reaching over Giants blockers to grab his jersey, clutching at his number 10 from behind. Somehow he twisted out of their grasp, ran back a few yards into a safe spot, and looked desperately for a receiver. He chucked the ball downfield toward Tyree, who raised both hands and brought the ball down on top of his helmet. Are you kidding me? Tyree pressed the ball tight against his head and held on for his life as Patriots safety Rodney Harrison leveled him. The only thing more incredible than Manning's scramble was the ridiculous catch. Four plays later Manning found WR Plaxico Burress in the corner of the end zone to give the Giants a breathtaking 17-14 win.

Yes, perfection is tough. That's why they call it perfection. Despite his flaws, Clinton had a good run. But he didn't have the helmet catch. This match goes to the Super Bowls, now up by two points in America Bowl with two matches left. George Bush and Barack Obama are the Presidents' last hope -- can they do it? Take your protein pill and put your helmet on -- here comes the season finale.

Score after this match: Super Bowls 22, Presidents 20.

Go to next match.

Game 41: George H.W. Bush vs. Super Bowl XLI

2010-02-05T02:18:00.004-05:00

We don't have Royal Families in American government or football. Here's about as close as it gets. Prescott Bush was a Wall Street banking tycoon from Connecticut who became a U.S. Senator in 1952. He never made it to President, but he had a son and a grandson who did. Archie Manning was a quarterback for the New Orleans Saints from 1972 to 1982. He never made it to the Super Bowl, but he had two sons who did. Family connections don't guarantee a ride to the top in the NFL or the USA, but these guys show it sure doesn't hurt.

Archie's sons Peyton Manning and Eli Manning both won Super Bowls (putting them atop the NFL father-son family tree that includes Phil and Chris Simms, Kellen Winslow I and II, Joe and Dan Klecko, and of course Mosi and Lofa Tatupu). Peyton entered rain-soaked Super Bowl XLI in 2007 respected as a great quarterback but with a reputation for not winning the big ones. And it didn't look good this time either when Chicago Bears return specialist Devin Hester took the game's opening kickoff back 93 yards for a score -- the first TD on an opening kickoff in Super Bowl history. Later that quarter, a Thomas Jones run set up a Rex Grossman-to-Muhsin Muhammad TD pass that gave the Bears a 14-6 lead after one quarter.

But Manning and the Colts defense pushed back. By the half, the Colts were up 16-14. They then turned to a ball control offense, setting loose running backs Dominic Rhodes and Joseph Addai to eat time. They combined for 190 ground yards. The Colts D, spearheaded by safety Bob Sanders, forced three Bears fumbles in the game and intercepted Grossman twice in fourth quarter to seal a 29-17 win. When it was done, Tony Dungy was the first African-American head coach to win a Super Bowl.

George Herbert Walker Bush sailed into office as Ronald Reagan's longtime VP. His international expertise as former Director of the CIA, and his connections to big business and the oil industry, seemed to color some of his key moves. The Berlin Wall came down under Bush's watch. When Iraq invaded oil-rich Kuwait, Bush launched Operation Desert Storm to push Iraq out -- and begin a new era of U.S. involvement in the Persian Gulf. Domestically, he did not control the ball. He said "Read my lips. No new taxes!" but there were more taxes. The government paid a king's ransom to failed, poorly regulated Savings and Loans. By 1992, the economy was hurting super-badly, and Bush lost his seat to Bill Clinton.

Score this for the Super Bowls. They go one point up as we head into the thrilling final weekend of America Bowl. Consider this our own version of the two-minute warning.

Score after this match: Super Bowls 21, Presidents 20.

Go to next match.

Game 40: Ronald Reagan vs. Super Bowl XL

2010-02-04T00:07:00.005-05:00

Super Bowl XL in 2005 was blanketed in feel-good symbolism but on the field was an error-plagued dud. Ronald Reagan came in with a similar approach as the 40th U.S. President -- but he made it work.

The Steelers were back in the Super Bowl after a ten-year absence, trying again to win their fifth Super Bowl ring -- or "One for the Thumb," as the braggy rallying cry went. This game would be the final stop for "The Bus," 13-year-veteran running back Jerome Bettis, who'd never won a Super Bowl. It would be another chance to win one for Steelers head coach Bill Cowher, who'd been at the helm since 1992 but lost in his only previous trip to the big game, 27-17 to the Cowboys in Super Bowl XXX. The Steelers began the season poorly and were seeded 6th in the AFC playoffs, then they made a storybook surge to reach the Super Bowl. The Seahawks, led by QB Matt Hasselbeck and RB Shaun Alexander, had an NFC-leading 13-3 record but still came in as underdogs.

Pittsburgh's 21-10 win was messy and controversial. Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger, in becoming the youngest QB to win a Super Bowl, threw for just 123 yards, no touchdowns, and 2 interceptions -- for a rating of 22.6. Really? Besides his 75-yard TD scamper, Steelers RB Willie Parker racked up 18 yards. Bettis, the team's goal-line pile-driver, didn't see the end zone. The Seahawks were plagued by dropped passes and so many drive-killing penalties that coach Mike Holmgren probably still has nightmares.

Reagan rode in promising a hopeful new "morning in America." For the most part, he delivered. The economy and the national mood lifted during his two terms from 1981 to 1988. Some wondered whether the former actor -- at age 69 the oldest man ever elected President -- was up to the task. He sure did like to simplify stuff. He said: "All the waste in a year from a nuclear power plant can be stored under a desk." His idea for a space-based "Star Wars" defense against Soviet missiles seemed outlandish. But it may have helped negotiations with Soviet leader Mikhail Gorbachev that led to a scaling back of nuclear arms. Ultimately, unable to hold together, the USSR dissolved. Reagan also ran up a huge deficit and let corporations run wild in a "greed is good" era of leveraged buyouts, big-hair bands and shoulder pads. He let underlings carry out the illegal shenanigans of the Iran-Contra scandal.

But Reagan remains an icon of American swagger and self-sufficiency. And so The Gipper wins one for the Presidents, who end a four-game losing streak and even the score as America Bowl's clock ticks down.

Score after this match: Super Bowls 20, Presidents 20.

Go to next match.

Game 39: Jimmy Carter vs. Super Bowl XXXIX

2010-02-03T00:01:00.003-05:00

Patriots versus Eagles. Talk about an "America Bowl." Sounds like the sides for a flag football game at Toby Keith's backyard barbecue. American Flag football.

This game threatened to break out into excitement on several occasions, and it stayed close all the way. By beating the Eagles in Super Bowl XXXIX, Pats QB Tom Brady lifted his career record to 3-0 in Super Bowls and 9-0 in the postseason. Basically he was making a mockery of the NFL's "Any Given Sunday" mantra -- that idealized notion that any team can beat any other team if they really want it. On the contrary, it seemed like the more a game mattered, the more invulnerable Brady and his Patriots had become.

Philly scored first, and Eagles receiver Terrell Owens, coming back from a broken leg, was stunning with nine catches for 122 yards. But by the end of the second quarter Brady had his rhythm. He hit receiver Deion Branch to spearhead touchdown drives late in the second quarter and early in the third. Pats RB Corey Dillon started finding holes; his runs allowed Brady to use play-action passes to keep it moving. With the score tied at 14-14, Brady, rattled off a quick flare to Troy Brown and a dropped dump pass out of the shotgun to running back Kevin Faulk. Then in a beautiful play-action, Brady faked a hand-off to Branch, and Branch sprinted to the sideline to haul in a pass. Five plays later, Dillon punched in another TD, and the Patriots were up 21-14 (and a FG made it 24-14).

The Eagles had a little time to come back -- but acted like they had a lot. With 5:40 left, they took almost four minutes to drive downfield and make it 24-21. When a Patriots punt gave the Eagles the ball at their own four, the only thing QB Donovan McNabb had time for was to chuck a game-ending interception. Philly fans ever since have doubted coach Andy Reid's clock-management expertise and McNabb's stamina (allegedly he was nauseous and exhausted during the final scoring drive).

Jimmy Carter came into office amid high hopes and tough times. The former peanut farmer and Naval officer from Georgia found it difficult to get traction during a period of inflation, recession, disco, and general national crankiness in the late 1970s. His affable personality magnified the sense that maybe he was just too wimpy to get it done. It's unclear whether anyone got nauseous, but it didn't end well. In November 1979, 52 Americans were taken hostage in Iran and held for 14 months, a period that included the Presidential election of 1980, in which Carter got the goobers beaten out of him by Ronald Reagan.

Carter, make no mistake, was genuine patriot. But he was no Super Bowl XXXIX.

Score after this match: Super Bowls 20, Presidents 19.

Go to next match.

Game 38: Gerald Ford vs. Super Bowl XXXVIII

2010-02-02T00:20:00.004-05:00

In 1974, Gerald Ford and the stunt of streaking gained prominence in America. Both phenomena were, in no small way, products of the media. The media had brought down Richard Nixon, whose cover-up of the Watergate scandal was exposed by enterprising news reporters, forcing him to resign in '74 and leave the nation's highest office to Ford, the only U.S. president never to be elected as either a President or Vice President. Streaking -- running in public naked -- became an outrageous fad in 1974 and was covered everywhere in the news, which was the main reason people did it. That year Ray Stevens scored a Billboard number one hit with "The Streak," a novelty song whose final verse included a fake news report about some indecent exposure during halftime at the basketball playoffs.

It is not well remembered that there was a streaker during halftime at Super Bowl XXXVIII in 2004. A British guy named Mark Roberts sneaked onto the field disguised as a referee, stripped down to a thong, and ran around until Patriots linebacker Matt Chatham tackled him. What we most remember about the game of course (sadly, because it was a crazy-good game) is Janet Jackson's tawdry "wardrobe malfunction" during the official halftime show. Mr. Roberts' run in the buff came after Jackson's act. What a bad day to streak! Next to Jackson's choreographed display, his act seemed even more rinky-dink than already it was.

What had happened between 1974 and 2004? The world changed. Rinky-dink went pro. Corporate entertainment and nonstop media became pervasive. Our entertainment options were exploding, forcing even the NFL to work to keep our attention. And not just at halftime. By tweaking its rules year by year, the league figured out how to produce higher scoring, more evenly matched, more thrilling games.

Super Bowl XXXVII was tremendous entertainment. Back and forth it went. The Patriots scored, then the Panthers...then Patriots, Panthers, Patriots, Panthers. The fourth quarter was unbelievable, with 37 points scored. QB Jake Delhomme led the Panthers to two TDs to take a 22-21 lead with 6:53 on the clock. New England got the ball back and drove 68 yards for a touchdown -- a Tom Brady pass to Mike Vrabel -- plus a two point conversion: Patriots 29-22. With time ticking down, the Panthers punched back. Delhomme capped a drive with a TD pass to WR Ricky Proehl, making it 29-29 with 1:08 to play.

Overtime? No, sir. Brady led the Pats inside Carolina's 30, and Adam Vinatieri kicked a 41-yard field goal to win the game as time ran out.

Ford, himself a former football player, stands no chance of matching this classic. He pardoned Nixon, signed the Helsinki Accords to thaw the Cold War a bit. He lost his job to Jimmy Carter, who comes up next in America Bowl. Can you feel the momentum turning? We're all tied up now.

Score after this match: Presidents 19, Super Bowls 19.

Go to next match.

Game 37: Richard M. Nixon vs. Super Bowl XXVII

2010-02-01T00:11:00.001-05:00

Ask yourself this. Which of these two statements is more unbelievable: "Richard Nixon has resigned from the Presidency in disgrace" or "Ladies and gentlemen, your Super Bowl champions: the Tampa Bay Buccaneers"?

The Bucs had become a benchmark for badness in the NFL. They started in the league in 1976 and lost their first 26 games. Going into the 2002 season, they had compiled exactly twice as many losses as wins in their storied history: 131-262-1. But new coach Jon Gruden took them all the way this season, crushing the favored Raiders 48-21 in the first Super Bowl to feature two teams named after pirates. The tenacious Tampa D picked off Raiders QB Rich Gannon five times. Suddenly, we didn't have Tampa Bay to kick around anymore.

Unlike Gruden, Nixon's ambition to come out on top got the better of him. His political comeback, after he'd lost the election of 1960, was gutsy. But he trusted no one. He made lists of enemies. The cover-up of the Watergate break-in eventually pointed to him, and he was done. In the end, his strengths and weaknesses meant little compared to his legacy: leaving a generation distrustful of government.

And so Nixon is done here too. Super Bowl XXVII wasn't a great game, but there were no major scandals (though Gruden had previously coached the Raiders and knew their plays). Nobody resigned in dishonor (though the Buccaneers became the first team in Super Bowl history to score three defensive touchdowns.). The Presidents drop another key game. The Super Bowls are knocking on the door.

Score after this match: Presidents 19, Super Bowls 18.

Go to next match.

Game 36: Lyndon B. Johnson vs. Super Bowl XXXVI

2010-01-31T09:30:00.001-05:00

Here is a story of two eager backups thrust by emergency into Number One roles under less than ideal circumstances. Lyndon B. Johnson, who'd never enjoyed being Vice President to John F. Kennedy, was rushed to Dallas and sworn in as the 36th President after Kennedy was shot on November 22, 1963. Novice QB Tom Brady, who'd played in only one NFL game in his career, stepped in as the Patriots' starting quarterback after Drew Bledsoe went down with an injury in Week 2 of the 2001 season.

Johnson had great moments, but he was a one-way player. Domestically he was first-string, maybe a Hall of Fame candidate. His tenure from 1963 to 1969 -- which included a landslide election win in 1964 -- saw passage of landmark legislation including the Civil Rights Act of 1964 outlawing racial discrimination, the Voting Rights Act of '65 banning racist polling rules, and the Public Broadcasting Act of 1967 to create public TV and radio. He launched Medicare, Medicaid, Food Stamps, Head Start, environmental protection laws, the National Endowments for the Arts and the Humanities. Foreign policy was the hole in his game, though. He hated having to devote time and resources to the war in Vietnam. But he refused to lose and increased rather than drew down U.S. involvement. Ultimately it was his frustration with ceaseless war issues, at home and abroad, that led LBJ to choose not to run in 1968.

Tom Brady came up huge in the Patriots emotional 2001 season, which was played in the dark shadow of the 9/11 attacks. With the poise of a veteran, Brady led New England to an unlikely division title. He seemed charmed. The Pats got a break in a snowy playoff versus the Raiders when what looked like a Brady fumble was ruled an incomplete pass, and the Pats kept the ball for a game-tying score.

In Super Bowl XXXVI the Patriots would face the Rams with their relentless passing attack, the "Greatest Show on Turf." The Rams had led the NFL with 503 points. QB Kurt Warner threw a league-topping 36 TD passes to a receiving corps that included Isaac Bruce, Torry Holt, Az-Zahir Rakim, Ricky Proehl, and running back Marshall Faulk, who also ran for 1,382 yards. But the Pats' defense attacked Warner. CB Ty Law picked off a Warner pass intended for Bruce and took it to the house for New England's first score. After three quarters, the Pats were up 17-3. It wasn't enough. The Rams drove for two touchdowns to tie the score at 17 with 1:30 left. Brady marshaled the Patriots downfield one last time and spiked the ball to stop the clock at the Rams' 24 yard line with 8 seconds left. Then kicker Adam Vinatieri did it again, nailing a 41-yard FG to ice the game. It was an all-time classic.

LBJ made his mark. The Patriots launched a dynasty. Score this for the Super Bowls.

Score after this match: Presidents 19, Super Bowls 17

Go to next match.

Game 35: John F. Kennedy vs. Super Bowl XXXV

2010-01-30T00:15:00.002-05:00

Two unsolved mysteries of the modern age:: The JFK assassination and how Trent Dilfer won a Super Bowl .

Even years later, both the 2000-01 Baltimore Ravens season and John F. Kennedy's brief time in office remain vexing and contradictory. The Ravens weren't a perfect team. Dilfer was an average quarterback. Kennedy was neither a perfect man nor a perfect President. Did someone once say it's the flaws that make a diamond shine brightest? No? Ok, never mind.

The Ravens had the NFL's 14th best scoring offense during the regular season. The quarterback who started their season, Tony Banks, threw 8 interceptions in 8 games and had a passer rating of 69. Dilfer took over after that and threw 11 INTs in 8 games, with a 76.6 rating. Like Kennedy, the Ravens had a tense October, losing three straight. At one point they went 21 straight quarters without a TD.

What the Ravens had, probably more so than Kennedy, was strong defense, led by marauding linebacker Ray Lewis. They allowed the fewest points in the NFL. Entering the postseason as a wild card, they allowed just one touchdown in three playoff games, winning 21-3, 24-10 and 16-3. In SB XXXV the offense did what it needed to do and the D did what it always did. The Ravens trounced the Giants 34-7. They intercepted Giants QB Kerry Collins four times. Did someone once say the best way to win the big game is with big defense? No? Never mind.

Kennedy was in office for just over two years before his assassination. He got in as a sort of wild card himself, with a family-funded campaign, some election day chicanery, a narrow margin of victory. Flaws? His Bay of Pigs attempt to overthrow Fidel Castro was a fiasco. The USSR's Nikita Kruschev got the better of him. The Berlin Wall must have seemed like a good idea at the time. He was a womanizing scoundrel. But JFK was young and telegenic and inspired the nation. He launched the Peace Corps and put muscle behind a space program that would plant a U.S. flag on the moon. "The torch has passed to a new generation of Americans," he proclaimed. "Ask not what your country can do for you but what you can do for your country," he suggested. You know, stuff like that.

Apologies to Trent Dilfer and Ray Lewis, but this victory goes to the Presidents.

Score after this match: Presidents 19, Super Bowls 16.

Go to next match.

Game 34: Dwight Eisenhower vs. Super Bowl XXXIV

2010-01-29T00:37:00.008-05:00

Hey, we like Ike. He was the President of the 1950s! The President of Elvis and Buddy Holly and Marilyn Monroe and the '57 Chevy. He took us from postwar gray to Happy Days. Got the space race rolling and the Interstate Highway System blasting off. The economy boomed. The suburbs sprawled. Adults dressed like adults. Good times. Eisenhower probably would have gone for a third term if not for that pesky Constitutional amendment.

Unfortunately, he was the 34th President, and Super Bowl XXXIV, in January 2000, was one of the best ever. The Rams came in as a scoring machine, led by quick-chucking QB Kurt Warner and speedy WRs Torry Holt and Isaac Bruce -- the greatest show on turf. They jumped out to a 16-0 lead. But back came the Titans. QB Steve McNair threw and ran the ball downfield. RB Eddie George punched it in twice. Al Del Greco nailed a field goal with 2:12 left in the game to tie it at 16. On the Rams' first play with the ball back, Warner found Bruce at the Titans' 38-yard, line and Bruce took it home for a 73-yard TD play, putting the Rams ahead 23–16.

In a final drive, Tennessee got the ball at its own ten with 1:54 left. They drove downfield, and with time for just one more play they had it at the Rams' ten. McNair hit WR Kevin Dyson with a quick pass, and Dyson made it to the two-yard line when Rams linebacker Mike Jones made what's now simply known as "The Tackle." He grabbed Dyson's legs and rolled, as Dyson reached the ball as far as he could toward the plane of the goal line. The ball finished inches short of a score as the clock ran out.

And so, to start the fourth quarter of America Bowl, a decade of newly exciting Super Bowl games would begin. Could the Presidents match the excitement and hold onto their lead? Get the popcorn -- we're heading toward a thrilling finish.

Score after this match: Presidents 18, Super Bowls 16

Go to next match.

Game 33: Harry Truman vs. Super Bowl XXXIII

2010-01-28T00:07:00.003-05:00

Everybody remembers Wally Pipp, the Yankees first baseman who sat out of the lineup for "one game" in 1925, only to be replaced by Lou Gehrig, who became known as the Iron Man by playing a then-record 2,130 consecutive games. Few remember the man who replaced Gehrig, though. It was Babe Dahlgren (he had exactly the wrong nickname, too) who played 12 unexceptional seasons for eight teams. What does baseball trivia have to do with John Elway winning his second Super Bowl or with 33rd President Harry Truman? Well, Truman could have been the next Babe Dahlgren, stepping in as a relative nobody for the beloved Iron Man of presidents, Franklin Delano Roosevelt, who like Gehrig became ill after breaking the longevity record, among other highlights. The fact that Truman made a name for himself working in such a long shadow says something - and sets us up for America Bowl Game 33.

The Broncos were supposed to win the big game this time, now 1999, and they did. They beat the Falcons decisively, 34-19. There was a little bit of drama, some off the field. Atlanta Coach Dan Reeves and Denver coach Mike Shanahan, former colleagues, made some mean pregame statements. The night before the game, Falcons safety Eugene Robinson tried to do the Dirty Bird dance with an undercover police officer, and his arrest became a team distraction. On the field, the Broncos picked off Falcons QB Chris Chandler three times. Elway passed for 336 yards (some of that exploiting a dissipated Robinson), RB Terrell Davis ran for 102, and fullback Howard Griffith punched in two one-yard TDs.

Former midwestern Senator Truman was a freshly minted vice president when he suddenly took the oath of office upon FDR's death, and many said, "Harry Who?" Addressing the press, he said "I don't know whether you ever had a load of hay fall on you, but when they told me yesterday what had happened, I felt like the moon, the stars and all the planets had fallen on me." Few expected much from him, although it was a vital time with much to do. Truman was a plainspoken man of action. He dropped two atomic bombs on Japan in 1945 to savagely end that war, then chilled relations with the Soviet Union, pretty much starting the Cold War. Also the Korean War. But his policies did help piece Europe back together after World War II. Domestically, his administration set up the G.I. Bill to help veterans thrive.

Historians rate Truman more kindly than contemporaries did. For Super Bowl XXXIII, not so much, either then or now. Score this one for the Presidents.

Score after this match (end of 3rd quarter): Presidents 18, Super Bowls 15.

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Game 32: Franklin D. Roosevelt vs. Super Bowl XXXII

2010-01-27T00:01:00.004-05:00

In his fourth Super Bowl, at age 37, Broncos quarterback John Elway finally got his winner's ring. The Packers, defending NFL champions, had been favored to win Super Bowl XXXII. Their quarterback, Brett Favre, had been named the league's MVP for a third straight season. But the Broncos came out on top in one of the great upsets in Super Bowl history. For once, Elway could hold that trophy high and shout to his critics: how do you like me now?

It was close all the way through. Denver Coach Mike Shanahan's blitz-happy defense swarmed Favre. Broncos RB Terrell Davis ran for three touchdowns (that's Mr. TD to you), the last of them breaking a tie with 1:45 left in the game to make the final score Broncos 31, Packers 24. It was all you'd want in a game. Only for Packers fans was it a day that will live in infamy.

But sorry again, Mr. Elway. (Do you know your name means "well" in Pig Latin?) Now you must oppose Franklin Roosevelt, the greatest President of the 20th century. Entering office while the Great Depression was ruining everything, FDR initiated New Deal reforms -- the Works Progress Administration, Social Security -- that got America back on its feet. Though confined to a wheelchair after being stricken with polio, he reminded America that "the only thing we have to fear is fear itself." He saw the country through World War II and a decisive beatdown of the Nazis. He was elected to four terms as President, a record that never will be broken. And under his administration Prohibition was repealed -- something all football fans can appreciate.

Yes, Elway punched his ticket to the Hall of Fame on January 25, 1988. But FDR isn't about to start losing now. With America Bowl getting tighter than ever, score a clutch victory for the Presidents.

Score after this match: Presidents 17, Super Bowls 15

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Game 31: Herbert Hoover vs. Super Bowl XXXI

2010-01-26T00:15:00.002-05:00

Here is a crossroads battle, a meeting of two opponents heading in opposite directions.

The once-great Green Bay Packers, entering Super Bowl XXXI in 1997, were resurgent. A generation had passed since the Packers had last been in an NFL title game, Super Bowl II in 1968. It had been a hard fall. But the Pack had the NFC's best regular-season record and blazed through the playoffs. Now they were on the road to glory again with the biggest prize in sight.

Herbert Hoover entered office in 1929 as the United States began its slide into The Great Depression. The stock market crashed in October. Poorly regulated banks, and then other companies, failed. Soon a quarter of the country was unemployed. The nation spiraled into an abyss. Hoover, a self-made millionaire, seemed neither compassionate nor capable enough to hold back the pain. He served one term and was done.

The Packers and Patriots played it close for a while. Pats QB Drew Bledsoe matched Packers QB Brett Favre in the first half, as they each tossed two TDs (Favre also ran for a TD to close the half). A New England touchdown toward the end of the third quarter pulled the Patriots within six points, at 27-21. Then the Packers ran away with it -- literally. Flashy returner Desmon Howard carried the ensuing kickoff 99 yards for a backbreaking touchdown: 35 to 21. That's how it ended. The Patriots' quest to "squeeze the cheese" had failed. Green Bay was riding high once more. Somewhere up there Coach Lombardi was smiling. Score one for the Super Bowls.

Score after this match: Presidents 16, Super Bowls 15

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Game 30: Calvin Coolidge vs. Super Bowl XXX

2010-01-25T00:45:00.003-05:00

There's a story, a joke really, about 30th President Calvin Coolidge. Not sure if it's true. Coolidge was famous, even while President, for not talking a lot. If this joke can be trusted, the great wit Dorothy Parker was at a White House dinner, and she said to him: "Mr. President, I made a bet with a friend that I can get more than two words out of you." He replied: "You lose." Pretty good line. Parker probably made it up. If Coolidge really was that funny, why didn't he blab more, like Howie Mandel? Coolidge certainly kept things low key in office, and Miss Parker wasn't the only intellect to take note. H.L. Mencken wrote: "There were no thrills while he reigned, but neither were there any headaches. He had no ideas, and he was not a nuisance."

Here's what would have been a good line: if Cowboys cornerback Larry Brown pulled a Coolidge and said "you lose" to the Steelers during Super Bowl XXX. Brown rose from his own sort of quiet obscurity to pick off two Neil O'Donnell passes and help the Cowboys win 27-17.

The 1996 Super Bowl was a decent game. Not a classic. The Steelers never held the lead or even a tie, but things kept threatening to become close. Pittsburgh got to within 3 points, trailing 20-17 in the 4th quarter, and then they sacked Cowboys QB Troy Aikman to force a punt and get the ball back late. But then that Larry Brown picked off a pass intended for backup WR Andre Hastings and took it to the Steelers' four-yard line. RB Emmitt Smith punched it in for the game-sealing TD. The Cowboys were on their way to being the team of the 1990s.

Brown forever joined the list of "what's his name?" football heroes who will always be remembered for stepping up big when the stakes were highest (for example, remember that other guy?). Coolidge receded forever onto the list of Presidents about whom not much more is remembered than their names. Punch one in for the Super Bowls.

Score after this match: Presidents 16, Super Bowls 14

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Game 29: Warren G. Harding vs. Super Bowl XXIX

2010-01-24T02:16:00.003-05:00

In a 1962 survey of historians, Warren G. Harding ranked 31st out of the 31 Presidents who had served up to that time. By 1982, a Chicago Tribune poll placed Harding second to last, edging out William Henry Harrison, who died in office one month after his inauguration. That's like when the Cleveland Browns beat the Detroit Lions.

Harding himself spent only two and a half years on the job, also passing away while in office. He was a charismatic guy and a supporter of civil rights. But things didn't go really well under his watch. That Teapot Dome scandal remains a Superdome of political debacles, still half a page in many U.S. history books.

Super Bowl XXIX, in Miami in 1995, was awful. You might even call it "Hardinglike." In an all-California game, the 49ers creamed the Chargers, 49-26 (ok, it was cool that the 49ers lived up to their name and got 49). Niners QB Steve Young threw for 6 TDs and no interceptions. Yeah, in the Super Bowl. The Chargers made history by scoring the first two-point conversions in a Super Bowl, after two meaningless touchdowns in the second half. No, not a great game. Not a close game. But sometimes excellence is its own reward. Passing for six touchdowns in the Super Bowl? Come on. Score one for the game -- with the Presidents still up a field goal.

Score after this match: Presidents 16, Super Bowls 13

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Game 28: Woodrow Wilson vs. Super Bowl XXVIII

2010-01-23T00:19:00.008-05:00

Every so often in life, there occurs an unfathomable coincidence that makes you say: "uh, ok."

Here we go: In 1913, Thomas Woodrow Wilson becomes the 28th President of the United States. That same year, Thomas E. Wilson, a completely separate person, becomes president of a Chicago meatpacking company called Morris & Co. That same year, 1913, sees the formation of Ashland Manufacturing Co., a business created to market the by-products of slaughterhouses. Stay with me. In 1915, Thomas E. Wilson is appointed president of Ashland, and by 1931 the business's name is changed to the Wilson Sporting Goods Co. After World War II, Wilson himself works with football great Knute Rockne to develop a football made from the finest leather, with lock-stitch seams and triple lining. The Wilson ball eventually is adopted by the National Football League and used, among other places, to play Super Bowl XXVIII in 1994.

Flashback to 1918, while Woodrow Wilson serving his second term: somewhere else completely Ralph J. Wilson Jr. is born. After World War II, Ralph Wilson forms Wilson Industries and later buys into the fledgling American Football League, becoming owner of the Buffalo Bills. By 1994 the Bills have lost three consecutive Super Bowls and are heading into their fourth in a row. That's right, Super Bowl XXVIII, a rematch against the Dallas Cowboys. Get that ball ready.

Flashback to Woodrow Wilson. He gets off to a quick start. In 1913 he creates the Federal Reserve System. He strengthens antitrust laws and sets up a graduated income tax. Then war breaks out in Europe in 1914, and though no one realizes it at first, it's World War I. By the time the U.S. gets involved in 1917, it's almost done. Wilson seeks to create a League of Nations to ensure world peace, but he won't compromise on the details, and the U.S. never joins it. That fumble sets up the ultimate rematch: World War II.

The Bills got off to a quick start, too. In the first quarter, kicker Steve Christie hit a 54-yard field goal -- a Super Bowl record. An 80-yard touchdown drive put the Bills ahead 10-6, and an interception led to a FG that had Buffalo on top 13-6 at the half. Then the war gods raged and Buffalo faltered. Less than a minute into the second half, Dallas took a Thurman Thomas fumble in for a game-tying TD. The rout was on. The Cowboys won 30-13, and the Bills became the only team in pro sports history to lose four straight championship games. After that the Bills were not in Super Bowls again. Thankfully. You might say that, in President Wilson's words, the AFC side of the Super Bowl was once again "safe for democracy." But this one was was really no contest. The Presidents claim victory in this match.

Score after this match: Presidents 16, Super Bowls 12

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Game 27: William Howard Taft vs. Super Bowl XXVII

2010-01-22T00:03:00.001-05:00

Life isn't fair. The monumental Super Bowl III drew its America Bowl match against the monument-inspiring Thomas Jefferson. It's a shame either of them had to lose. Now the mediocre 27th President William H. Taft is matched against one of the lamest Super Bowl games ever, the Cowboys' 52-17 slaughter of the Bills in Super Bowl 27. It's a shame either of them has to win.

There is really little to recommend the ballgame. Buffalo would lose its third straight Super Bowl. The Bills turned the ball over a record nine times, making the Dallas win too easy. Bills quarterback Jim Kelly was injured in the first half and left the game. The second Bills TD shouldn't even have counted, because backup QB Frank Reich clearly had a foot over the line of scrimmage when he threw it. Cowboys QB Troy Aikman actually ran for more yards than Bills RB Thurman Thomas. Near the merciful end, Cowboys DT Leon Lett picked up a fumble and was about to make the score 58-17, but angry Bills WR Don Beebe raced up to him and smacked the ball out of his hand at the one-yard line. That's the kind of game it was. Just a frustrating smack.

Taft was no thriller either. He's famous for, well, being obese. He reportedly ate a dozen eggs, a pound of bacon, and stack of pancakes for breakfast. And then it was lunch time. But, coming between Roosevelt and Wilson, all he really needed to do was fill the space for four years. Oh, he sure did. Life isn't fair. Again we ask the tiebreaker question: if you had to re-live either the Taft years or Super Bowl XXVII, which would you choose? We award this point to the Presidents.

Score after this match: Presidents 15, Super Bowls 12

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Game 26: Theodore Roosevelt vs. Super Bowl XXVI

2010-01-21T08:39:00.001-05:00

There's something happening here. What it is ain't exactly clear.

Scene 1: Circa 1883. Theodore Roosevelt is in a field with a rifle, killing buffalo.

Scene 2: Super Bowl 26, in 1992. Washington is on the field, killing Buffalo.

Scene 3: September 5, 1901. William McKinley, the 25th President of the United States, is in Buffalo, N.Y., attending an exposition. There's a man with a gun over there! McKinley is shot and killed. Vice president Theodore Roosevelt is rushed to Buffalo, where he is sworn in as U.S. President number 26. Then he goes to Washington.

Stranger things have happened in America than this bizarre and somewhat macabre confluence of Buffalo-linked events. But not many. We're still putting the pieces together. We do know that at one point, after he got to Washington, President Roosevelt threatened to ban football. At the time, people said it was because he believed the sport too violent. But maybe, just maybe he had a sense something bigger was in the air. Maybe he heard distant echoes of a future warp in time, and he tried to yell Stop! Hey, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down!

Super Bowl XXVI was a Buffalo slaughter, a disaster for the Bills. The Redskins were up 17-0 at halftime and 24-0 before the Bills even got on the scoreboard. Only two meaningless Buffalo touchdowns in the last quarter, putting the final tally at 37-24, made the game even seem close. Or were they meaningless?

Teddy Roosevelt's achievements in office from 1901 to 1909 have been well documented by the authorities. He was wildly popular and used his "bully pulpit" to advocate strong action and get results. He took on big business monopolies and busted those trusts. He conserved 150 million acres of national forest and the wildlife living in it. He initiated construction of the Panama Canal and won a Nobel Peace Prize for arbitrating the end of the Russo-Japanese War. At least for our purposes here, there is no mystery. Send this case to the X-Files, but put it in the winner's column for the Presidents.

Score after this match: Presidents 14, Super Bowls 12

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Game 25: William McKinley vs. Super Bowl XXV

2010-01-20T05:33:00.003-05:00

The lesson of America Bowl Game 25 is a bitter one, but a lesson best not forgotten -- a cautionary tale of how things that begin with success and promise can suddenly, unexpectedly, go wrong. William McKinley, America's 25th President, was still celebrating election to his second term in office when he was shockingly slain by an assassin in 1901. The Buffalo Bills rode into Super Bowl 25 seemingly untouchable, having won the AFC Championship game 51-3. Then they lost the Super Bowl when a field goal attempt by Scott Norwood, with eight seconds on the clock, sailed "wide right." The punch that hurts the most is the one you never saw coming.

The Bills indeed seemed unassailable. Their offense had scored the most points in the NFL during the 1990 regular season. QB Jim Kelly was the league's highest rated passer; RB Thurman Thomas was top NFL rusher. The D was led by tenacious defensive end Bruce Smith, second in the NFL in sacks. The Bills were 13-3 in the regular season, and in squashing the Raiders in the AFC title game had 6 interceptions and 7 touchdowns. They entered the Super Bowl as 7-point favorites over the Giants.

McKinley won the elections of 1896 and 1900 by giant margins, both times over multi-election loser William Jennings Bryan. Like the poster says, McK's theme was "Propserity at Home, Peace Abroad." He worked hard on both. In 1898, Spain apparently sunk the USS Maine, and it was time for the Spanish-America War. At home, McKinley was pro-business, defending high tariffs to protect domestic producers (a stance he later relaxed) and defending the gold standard. The nation was in transition, becoming more industrial. In the end, when McKinley seemed to be sitting pretty, it was a disgruntled mill worker who shot him.

Super Bowl XXV was a true test of wills that became more thrilling as it went on. The Bills led 12-10 at halftime, and them the lead started changing hands like a $10 poker chip. The Giants pulled ahead 17-12 on an O.J. Anderson TD. The Bills went back out front 19-17 on a Thomas run. Matt Bahr's second field goal nudged the Giants back ahead 20-19. With the clock ticking down, the Bills drove downfield until the Giant stopped them at the 30 yard line with 8 seconds left, and Norwood lined up for a 47-yard game-winning field goal. Wide right. Game over. Giants win. An unexpected end for Buffalo, but an epic, America-Bowl-point-winning game. Look out, here come the Super Bowls.

Score after this match: Presidents 13, Super Bowls 12.

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Game 24: Grover Cleveland vs. Super Bowl XXIV

2010-01-19T09:49:00.008-05:00

Here is what America lives for: the comeback. As the 22nd President, Grover Cleveland lost America Bowl Game 22, leaving the presidents with a narrow two-point lead at halftime. Now, here he was back in the saddle and gunning for revenge -- as 24th President. Yes, Cleveland was the only U.S. President ever, in any weight class, to regain the title. He was 22nd President from 1885 to 1889, then got robbed in 1888 -- he received the most votes for 23rd President but lost by electoral vote to Benjamin Harrison. Now look who's back.

Super Bowl 24 returned deep experience, too. Joe Montana, quarterback for the 49ers, was 3-0 in Super Bowls already. Broncos QB John Elway was 0-3. By the time these two men were done, no quarterback had started more Super Bowl games. But could Elway come back from defeat and achieve vindication? Could Cleveland?

For Elway, well, apparently not. SB XXIV was the crushing slaughter that prior Broncos Super Bowls foretold, and one of the least competitive Super Bowls ever. The Broncos entered the game with the NFL's best defense, but they couldn't prevent the 49ers from scoring two touchdowns in each quarter (that's eight total), smashing all kinds of records en route to a 55-10 Bronco-bashing. Montana equaled Terry Bradshaw with a 4-0 lifetime Super Bowl tally. He became the first three-time Super Bowl MVP and set a new record with 5 TD passes before he was lifted from the game for 49ers backup Steve Young (who years later would break that record). Elway would need to wait for his day.

Here was Cleveland's chance for redemption, matched against a lousy game. Could he do it? His second term began in 1893 with a stock market panic. Soon banks and railroads were closing and jobs were being lost. Cleveland thought it would help to repeal the Sherman Silver Purchase Act, taming inflation. In foreign policy, he stood his ground, forcing Britain to accept arbitration over some disputed territory in Venezuela. Cleveland didn't make much history in his return to the big stage. But in the end he was more presidential than this Super Bowl was Super. Score a close one for the Presidents.

Score after this game: Presidents 13, Super Bowls 11.

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Game 23: Benjamin Harrison vs. Super Bowl XXIII

2010-01-18T09:56:00.003-05:00

Time does funny things. It softens us up when we're alive. After we are gone, it can soften the reputations we leave behind. Benjamin Harrison for a long time was lumped in with all the late-1800s, post-Reconstruction Presidents as a bunch of lawyers who didn't do much during a time when the nation slowly became more businesslike. He was called a "human iceberg." Teddy Roosevelt said of Harrison, "he is a cold-blooded, narrow-minded, prejudiced, obstinate, timid psalm-singing Indianapolis politician." (Indianapolis, ouch. Maybe Teddy was thinking of Colts receiver Marvin Harrison). But time has done its business. Some modern historians give Ben Harrison high marks for making strides in foreign policy, like the time he set up Samoa as the first American protectorate, and advocated for a canal in Central America, and nailed down various other overseas treaties. It's something, anyway.

How has time treated Super Bowl XXIII? Look, let's be honest: at this point for most people, all the Super Bowls of the 1980s and 1990s pretty much blend together. This 1989 game was pretty representative of the time, a rematch between the 49ers and Bengals. But this one was exceptionally super-duper. In a game that went down to the last minute, it was 49ers 20, Bengals 16. Cincinnati led three different times, once on a crazy 98-yard kickoff return by -- who? -- Stanford Jennings. San Franciso kept tying it up but never held a lead until the final minute. Down 16-13 with about three minutes left, the 49ers took the ball at their own 8-yard line, and went 92 yards in 11 plays, mostly passes from QB Joe Montana to WR Jerry Rice and RB Roger Craig. They took the lead on a 10-yard pass to WR John Taylor with 34 seconds remaining. It was a classic, finally a Super Bowl worthy of the name. Another Harrison bites the dust.

Score after this match: Presidents 12, Super Bowls 11

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HALFTIME SHOW!

2010-01-17T13:00:00.000-05:00